Falcon Boy: Vol. 1: 49 ‘Falcon Boy’s ‘extraordinary things’’

Having been stuck in the back of the lorry for some time, our two favourite superheroes looked even more crumpled than they normally do.

Falcon Boy was not much taller than Ellis. He was still wearing his beak-hat-mask and a yellow t-shirt with the feather logo surrounding his initials. His trousers were covered in dust and his stout hiking boots were in need of a polish. When Ellis looked closely, she could see the beginnings of a moustache growing on his top lip.

There was nothing about Falcon Boy that would cause anyone to think that he was capable of much, really, let alone saving the world. As Falcon Boy would tell you himself, albeit rather too grandly, he was just an ordinary person who had taken it upon himself ‘to be doing extraordinary things’.

Actually, as we are all aware, Falcon Boy’s ‘extraordinary things’ so far don’t amount to much more than rescuing an elderly gardener from a tough of toughs. Since then, his career had been more of a matter of being seen than actually being seen to be doing things, extraordinary or otherwise.

This means that the sole justification for his continued existence is the perfect example of Panic Town’s fascination with celebrities. It is more a case of him being in the right place at the right time that created the whole mythology that now surrounds him than it was him dazzling the world with daring feats of derring-do.

If you follow the logic of this argument, then you might further consider the possibility that his subsequent kidnapping by Dr Don’t Know was actually because he was in the right place and the wrong place at both the right time and the wrong time, at the same time. However, you probably don’t need to follow the logic of this argument too closely. It will probably hurt your head.

Whether rightly or wrongly, it is a simple statement of fact that Falcon Boy, just like we decided with Ellis earlier, had been imbued with an extraordinariness that perhaps he might not have been imbued with, were he not central to this particular story.

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