Inteachán – Book Five: The Tallest Tower Crane 5: 15 ‘its own book of condolences’

Like a nation forced to sign its own book of condolences the video testaments continued relentlessly. Even on the happiest of occasions a camera’s lens can make you feel tongue-tied but imagine how it would make you feel at a moment like this.

Whole families standing before it.

Orphaned children.

Weeping parents.

Single men and women.

New-found friends clinging together.




Everyone waits in line for their turn.



Inteachán – Book Three: Operation Turnback 3: 7 ‘Front Square is full of boats again’

The next morning Mac awoke to find that Inteachán had made him breakfast.

She smiled kindly.

‘You must eat something, Mac. It has been three days now.’

Mac couldn’t manage a smile.

‘Why waste your time with a charlatan like me, my child? All I have done is tell you a lifetime of lies and nearly kill you.’ Mac started to sob. ‘There is nothing left for us to do.’

Inteachán didn’t answer. She looked out of the window.

‘Front Square is full of boats again. It must be high tide this morning.’

Inteachán looked back at Mac.

‘Stopping the flooding would be a start.’

Inteachán – Book Three: Operation Turnback 3: 6 ‘in lonely anguish’

Picture the scene.

You are twelve years old and the only person you know in the world has now decided that they are totally and utterly worthless. Worse than that, they have decided to destroy their entire life’s work page by page.

Inteachán was overwhelmed by the ferocity of Mac’s despair. He wouldn’t eat and she could hear him pacing his room in lonely anguish.

Inteachán eventually fell asleep to the sound of Mac sobbing.

Inteachán – Book One: The Song of the NotBeSpeak 1: 37 ‘Backstage’

Once through the door Inteachán found herself in a small control room to one side of the main stage.

A locked panel on the wall in front of her proved no match to her  skills and Inteachán soon had access to the main terminal for the stage lights.

It would be too obvious to turn off all the lights at once so Inteachán set the timer on the digital clock to allow the various set of lights to go off in sequence until none remained.

‘With any luck,’ she thought, ‘the band will be too busy to notice.’

Inteachán – Book One: The Song of the NotBeSpeak 1: 36 ‘Through the Kitchen’

Inteachán stood in an empty kitchen. Steel pans and wicked-looking knives hung on the wall. Three huge ovens dominated the room.

As it was just before the start of the show the kitchen had closed down and Inteachán looked around.

A sign above a door marked ‘Backstage’ instructed people not to enter unless they had official business.

‘You couldn’t get much more official than saving the world from total destruction,’ Inteachán said to herself as she opened the door and closed it quietly behind her.

Inteachán – Book One: The Song of the NotBeSpeak 1: 35 ‘The Dumb Waiter’

On the wall to her right was a dumb waiter used to supply artists with their pre-show meals.

Inteachán slipped her wrists free of the cable tie, leapt to her feet, grabbed the box, reached the dumb waiter, pressed the button and climbed inside before the Rock Star realised what was happening.

Frantically she pulled the door shut and felt herself descending in the darkness. As she did so Inteachán could hear the Rock Star raging up above her.

‘I’ll get you, you hateful little brat,’ screamed the deluded Rock Star. ‘And when I do you’ll know you’ve been got.’

Inteachán waited until the dumb waiter stopped descending. She pulled up the door and stepped out.

Inteachán – Book One: The Song of the NotBeSpeak 1: 34 ‘Inteachán Spots her Chance’

Inteachán had said very little while the Rock Star outlined his insane plan. She looked scared but this was only a ruse. Her hands were tightly bound behind her back and the chair she was sitting was getting more and more uncomfortable.

Inteachán realised that by gently moving her thumbs together in a clockwise rotation she was able to loosen the cable tie that bound her hands.

 By now the Rock Star had really lost the run of himself and was bounding around the room in his Cuban heels muttering about centuries of indignities finally being tallied up and taken for.

 He wasn’t paying any attention to Inteachán and she realised that this was her chance.

Inteachán – Book One: The Song of the NotBeSpeak 1: 33 ‘We will take this dirty old town by sunrise’

‘As you know, The5 exist in the spaces between things,’ explained the Rock Star. ‘The white between the words on a page, lines of a book or the editing of a film.’

The Rock Star rubbed his hands together.

‘Tonight The5 will reveal themselves in part to the world via the rapid cuts of the specially-created video that will be playing on the massive wall of screens behind the band.’

Inteachán said nothing.

‘As the video plays and the strobes pulse and the music deafens, the crowd will gradually become hypnotized to do the bidding of The5.’

The Rock Star leapt to his Cuban-heeled feet.

‘As the concert’s climax is reached I will blow the Horn and The5 will appear to 80 000 brand-new followers – plus the four of us in the band.’

‘We will take this dirty old town by sunrise.’

Inteachán – Book One: The Song of the NotBeSpeak 1: 32 ‘I am going to have to have you killed.’

‘What do you think will happen when I blow the horn?’ asked the Rock Star.

Inteachán didn’t reply.

‘The Summoning will begin,’ continued The Rock Star. ‘And once the Summoning has begun then there will be no stopping events.’ He smiled. ‘But you know all this, don’t you, because Mac has explained everything to you, hasn’t he?’

‘He has, replied Inteachán, ‘and I am now more convinced than ever that he was right.’

The Rock Star frowned.

‘I’m not going to argue with you, Inteachán,’ he replied. ‘I’m going to tell you the truth about what is really happening and then,’ he paused dramatically, ‘I am going to have to have you killed.’

Inteachán – Book One: The Song of the NotBeSpeak 1: 31 ‘Your tiny little mind would simply shatter’

‘You cannot begin to imagine what I have seen and heard,’ boasted the Rock Star. ‘Your tiny little mind would simply shatter.’

He stood up and walked to a desk. He opened a drawer and took out an ornate box. The Rock Star placed the box on the floor between Inteachán and his chair.

Inteachán eyes lit up.

‘This is what that geriatric dodderer sent you to fetch,’ said the Rock Star pointing at the box. ‘This box contains the Horn of Donn Cuailnge.’

The box was made from an ancient wood and was carved with figures that Inteachán couldn’t quite make out. Though the room was dim the box glowed bright from within.